Eleanor

Alone and confused, wondering,
will my heart ever mend?
One quick slice, that's all it takes
for the immense pain to forever end.

But with the fear of dying,
and always crying.
Suicide and self harm,
a sharp blade lay in my palm.

No matter what I do,
it's never enough.
The voices in my head,
will never give up.

It's sad to think that
people as young as me
feel this way and no longer
want to stay.

Scars on our wrists,
stomach, hips, and thighs.
We'll do anything
to not go outside.

Lies upon lies,
fake laughs and smiles that hide,
the brutal pain,
held within our eyes.

Starvation, no food -
for we don't feel beautiful.
Unless our stomachs are empty
and not full.

Aching muscles, tired eyes,
head always spinning,
and skin turning pale,
like the white Irish snow.

You almost collapse every time you stand,
breathe in,
breathe out,
your fate lays in your hands.

Stand up tall,
hold your head high.
Soon you'll pull through,
trust me -
You're stronger than what
you thought you knew.

Don't give up now,
it's no where near the end.
The future you I see,
is the one you've always wanted to be.

You are loved by many,
and are inspiring.
Girls look up to you,
and even a few guys too.

You might not of had
the best childhood,
or have the best memories
from your teenage years.

I know it's scary,
but you're slowly pulling through.
You are amazing,
look at the lights shine bright on you.


This poem means a lot to me, it's something I hold very close to my heart as I wrote this not too long after one of the toughest years of my life, 'Eleanor' (the name of my poem) really helped me stay positive and pull me through everything that happened.
Eleanor was written yearly last year as a class assignment and didn't expect it to have the impact it had on myself and my teacher. I hope you guys liked tonight's post, I know it's extremely different to what I usually post but this poem is a big part of who I am, and since you guys are my readers and I love you dearly, I want you to get to know me little more than what you already do.

You can interpret this however you wish.
If there's one thing I would like you to take away from this, it's that; no matter how alone you feel you will never be alone, you always have someone to talk to. Whether it be someone in person, someone on the phone, or even the internet. You are loved, your heart just hurts too much to feel it yet.

If you ever want someone, I am here 24/7, on Twitter or Instagram (@ImogenL05 for both).



- Imogen Louise .xx

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